JUST Eliminate Fear… yeah, right!

I saw this extremely helpful suggestion in a blog post today. It was number 1 out of 2 helpful tips for overcoming procrastination. It said:

“Eliminate Your Fear”

Oh, THANKS! Is that ALL?! I’ll get right on that… HA!

This makes me cringe, growl and laugh out loud, all at the same time.

If we could JUST eliminate fear, we’d all have done it by now.

The word JUST has become one of my biggest pet peeves (second only to “woo woo” of course). It’s often used in personal development articles that are attempting to give how-to advice on something.

But as soon as the word JUST appears, they’ve given you advice on one hand and totally minimized the steps and the amount of real work it’s going to take to implement it on the other.

Thus setting you up for failure or at the very least feeling like crap when you can’t seem to roll out of bed and JUST do it.
(No disrespect to Nike.)

When it comes to fear, none of us are supposed to be able to JUST eliminate it.

I don’t want this kind of advice and thinking out there convincing you that you are somehow not up to your goals or dreams or whatever task you’ve set yourself.

So listen to me very closely here…

You can’t JUST eliminate something that you have NO conscious control over.

Yes, you can eliminate all the black clothes in your wardrobe, or all the red meat purchases from your weekly shopping trips.

You have control of those and you have conscious choice.

But when it comes to fear you have neither of these things (at least not without training.)

Your brain’s fear response is a miracle of evolutionary brilliance. And it operates by shutting OFF your ability to think and choose.

You can no more eliminate fear than you can eliminate breathing.  They’re both controlled by the same part of your brain.

So does this mean you’re doomed to live inside your fears forever?

Definitely NOT.

Lucky for us, we have the ability to bring things that used to be UN-conscious into our conscious control.

Anyone who’s been potty trained can do it.
(And truly, this was NO small feat for any one of us!)

So when fear comes up, here’s what you CAN do:

• You CAN learn to become aware of the signs that it’s been triggered.

• You CAN learn to maintain your ability to think  and make clear choices when fear is present.

• You CAN learn  how to find the core imprint or memory at the root of your fear through spacious compassion.

• You CAN learn how to resolve your fears by bringing their wisdom into the light of your awareness.

But I’m not going to tell you to JUST do any of these things.

You might get to the first two today with no problem.

But the second two will take lots of practice and time, not to mention skills, steps, knowledge and guidance.

Something the “JUST do it” articles are often pretty short on.

And knowing all that in advance  is a GOOD thing.

That knowledge sets you up for success and for the long haul. It tells you to muster your desire and your willingness for something that will be eminently worth it in the end.

It doesn’t minimize the work OR the benefits of being able to achieve these things.

So next time someone’s blog or website tells you to JUST get over your fear, take that with a BIG grain of salt or, better yet… leave a comment and ask them to explain HOW.

I’d love to hear your thought on this. How do you take this kind of advice? And how does it make you feel? Let us know in the comments below.

And if it would totally jazz you to bring your fears under conscious control with compassion and awareness, shoot me an email at :
susan AT theheartsvoice DOT com
I’m currently thinking about how and when I’ll be teaching this and I’d love to hear of your interest!